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well im working as a custodian, cleanign and getting a school ready for the next school year. the people are nice and the job is ok. Im also working as a pizza boy at times when they need me. Its worth it and think that i have actually began to move my life around in a different direction. Hopefully it is in a good one but only time will tell.

These jobs leave me with little time to go walking or running or other active things. I still need to lose weight and get in shape. Im working on cutting back on food but the past two days i have been slipping. I gotta get back on schedule.

Every night i have been having pretty much the same dream, where tricia and i just hang out and eventually fall asleep together, its not good. It just makes me miss her so much more. I know that its going to be tough but the not talking to her sucks. I know that she missed me an she knows i miss her but theres nothing we can really do about it unless she wants to get back together. It just sucks because i miss her and i still love her. I know i keep saying the same things over and over again but i just dont know what else to say.

upping the anty

walked just under 8 miles today, worked for 4 hours, played basketball and tossed a disc around. IT was an all-right day, i need to up the anti to so that i can lose weight and get ready for the firefighters exam. Its time to get serious. I need to lose weight, gain cardio and muscle. Im going to start 8 minute abs in addition to excrutiators, sit ups and push ups. Its going to be hard but it will be well worth it in the end i think.

keep it going

so last night i did sit ups and push ups before i went to sleep. I had also walked 4 miles with my mom. I need to start walking more.

I also started to eat less, mostly because i want to lose weight and become healthy, but also because i just havent had an appetite. Its hard for me to eat knowing that The girl that I love and miss, and i are not talking. It might be fore the best but I not sure how. I want to see her and hold her but I do not think that she feels the same way. Maybe once in a while she does, but she is also trying to keep busy and not think about it all the time. It is hard on both of us i know but I still wish that we could talk and see each other, even though its probably not a good idea. I really dont know what to think anymore. I just have to keep myself busy and hope for the best.

Im going to keep reading and trying to lose weight, and soon I will start studying for the Firefighters exam. I really want to do well on it so Im going to give it my best effort ever.

On the job front, I have been asking around and one Custodial Engineer offered me the job but not until the first or second week in July. Thats going to be hard, but it will be good. It depends on the days that he gives me but i might not be able to go to the Invasion of Normandy paintball trip. It all depends on what days he will have me working. I would really want to go but if i cant, I cant. I was also offered to work this sunday making pizza for the pizza place down the block. I dont mind at all, in fact i would love to do it.

idk

well i miss Tricia so much. I know that we are no longer together but i still miss her and love her. I wish I knew what to do or to say but maybe that wont even help. I guess ill just have to wait

today

basketball

football

tossed a disc

swam

walked

tomorrow rinse and repeat

walking

started walking today walked 4.5 miles, gonna bring that up a notch everyday and then gonna start running.

FireFighter

So i am going to take the firefighters exam this september. Im going to be studying for that all summer as well as trying to lose weight and get in shape. Im actually rather hoping on getting called so that it will give me something to look forward to.

great

well i fucked up big time. So I had a panic attack last night and the night before because I didn't know what I was going to do with my life and I was freaking out about being alone. So i texted my ex-girlfriend and asked her if she could talk tomorrow. She said sure why whats up I told her I was having a panic attack about my life and everything. So she proceeded to call me, and try and make sure I was ok. I told her I have been freaking out because I cant keep myself busy and that this break up sees to be hitting me extremely hard. It was terrible. I also said that I felt like she was doing much better than me. She said she wasn't and that its been hard on her but she's just been keeping busy and preoccupied. Then I told her that i just miss her a lot and that Im scared I was never going to see her again. She proceeded to tell me that we were over for good and that, we weren't getting back together. That hurt me a lot. I was freaking out because I knew that was the truth but I didn't want to believe it. I said that maybe we shouldn't talk anymore, and she said she's been trying to tell me and hint that to me for a while. I see it now but I guess I just took it as her being busy because she is always busy. At this point She was getting a little mad at me because I was being stupid (in my mind). Then I asked her to be honest with me and She said of course, and I proceeded to ask her a question. Not the question I actually wanted answered but the first thing that popped into my head. It was a very stupid question and I completely regret asking it. I knew the answer was no but i asked it anyway. I was a complete moron about this, I really just wanted to know if she missed me. So after I asked her the stupid question she got extremely offended and mad at me (which is understandable, I would be furious with me as well). She yelled fuck you Rob at me and hung up. I tried calling her back to apologize but she wouldn't take my phone call. I don't blame her one bit. So texted her saying I was so sorry about everything and that I understand she doesn't want to talk to me again. I also said that this would be the last time she would hear from me. I'm not going to text her or call her or anything. She broke up with me for many reasons including getting away from me and living her own life free of anyone else. She said she still wanted to be friends but I don't know how to do that, at least not now, so soon after our break up. So I guess I'm just sad that Im losing one of my best friends. Its going to be hard I know but I will try and get through this. I have to. I know she is going to get through this better than me because she is a stronger person than I am.

On a side note, I just want her to be truly happy, but I wish that happiness included me. She promises me that we will see each other again but I am almost very certain that after last night, she will never want to see me again. I cant say I blame her. It just sucks because I spent 2 years of my life with her, and since Im only 21, that is 10% of my life. It is just hitting me a little harder than I would have thought because I am losing a lot of friends. A lot of people I might never see again. Friends from school who graduated, and even some friends from home who are moving far away to better things.

If you find and read this Tricia, I just really want to apologize for everything I have ever done to hurt you. No matter how big or small. I am truly sorry, and I hope that one day we can be best friends

day 2

started off well

i threw two goals to this new kid john, threw a hammer for a point to tom and handblocked doobs. thats when we were up 3-0. After that i didn't keep score. Safe to say i lacked alot after that. I started walking and not playing to my full potential. i walked a lot after that but i still caught a few goals and threw a few assists. It was a long practice but it was a decent one. Have a few prospects, pete looks like hes gonna stay, john, keith, mike all look good. For the womans team we got rennes sister, and christina; so they look good too.

My game was allright, and i divided it into my pros and cons:

pros:

short passes

give and gos

deep cuts

hands

cons:

deep game

cuts

deep throws

field vision

speed

layouts

things i have to work on alot

goals

faster

stronger

thiner

ripped

better

smarter

taller

time to do work!!

new semester

Just hit up the gym with b-cams, ran for 10 minutes on treadmill, free weights, bench, ran for 5 minutes.

Must go to gym tomorrow if i cant make practice. gotta work on throws and cuts.

Classes are done for today they went all right, day two tomorrow. Gonna run CTF tomorrow night and hit the gym right before hand.

-shower

-dinner at the girls

-sleep

long time coming, lots to tell

Its been a long time coming and things have been great for the most part. I was out of commission for a while with a partially torn hamstring. But dont you worry i am back and trying to get better than ever.

Ultimate:
Being out of the team for over 6 months sucks, it was painful to watch my team play, knowing full well that i couldn't. To be fair the team did its best without me. I almost think that i wont play next year knowing that they can be so much greater without me. I mean I will try to pick up my game and get faster and be a much better handler and cutter. My main problems re in confidence and skill. I lack skill their for my confidence goes down their for i play worse then i would. In the time that i have been off, my throws have gone down significantly and my speed is now slower than the speed at which Hawaii moves closer to japan (about 1 inch every year). I have one good thing going for me, and that is my height.

I am a 6 foot 5 inch tall monster who comes down with a lot of discs when they go up, I have decent hand eye coordination and i don't mind getting physical. Thats the extent of my game. This summer is either going to make or break me for the team. I am either going to be on the team and a primary handler who can beat almost everyone in the air(including Thomas) or i am going to be the towel/water boy for the team.

I have to work on my game so starting tomorrow i will be doing part of the SNERTZ workout once a week with some added things of my own. If I can lose 30 pounds by the end of September I will be where i want to be when it comes to starting to be in shape. If i lose that weight i will be a much healthier person, and a much better looking one. I am going to ask dave and doobs to give me a try out to see if I should even be on the team, or if i should do more.

Training:
Right now i have been doing push ups and sit ups and trying to do excruciators every night. So far i think i have lost maybe 5 pounds maybe. I don't know, i feel it in my jeans. I will also be doing a track workout once a week and working on throwing and cutting once a week as well. One big test for me will be wildwood, and then the biggest test will be the zodiac and the one i want dave and doober to give me.

Throws:
my throws are not where i want them to be, my flick drops too fast and it very o-i. My backhand is so weak that i feel like if i throw it full force at someone, it would be more like a push pass. I have to work harder on these two throws if i wish to succeed on the team.

Right now i feel as though Steven Stieglitz is right when he called me a liability on the team, i don't run I'm slow i cant keep up with my man, and my throws are not that good.

Im going to try and make my own self cutting drill that i can do but im not sure what i am going to incorperate into it, any pointers?

Beer:
So my friends and I decided to make our own beer and so far its fermenting. If it goes well we will experiment with out own flavors and hopefully eventually mass produce it and create Staten Island's first brewery or brew pub. I was just thinking that i could try something with mint but im not sure how it would go but we will see.

last games of the season

a last minute tournament has been schedualed for this up coming weekend. We will be versing bard vassar and marist at marist. Things are looking good but im not sure how we will do. I hope to skullfuck and walk away 2 and 1 for the day but i dont know.

Side notes: co-ed tourny 5-2 ratio, and we havent played in 2-3 weeks

dodgeball

dodgeball and volleyball are starting up, they have been going smoothly so far. We lost one game so far due to bad calls and us losing 3 on 1 battles. I dont know but i play again tonight and we have to win cause i want a campionship shirt.
Volleyball im in two groups, co-ed and mens. the means team has only lost 1 or 2 games but the co rec team is undefeated going into the playoffs. We should kick ass
Ill let you know more later

Day 1

Wow its been a hard day. I heard news of "attacks" across campus where the victims have died but were still moving around. I heard that the only form of identification is a bandanna that the remaining survivors wear around their legs or arms. I saw a few people arm themselves and i had to do so myself. I loaded up with a 35 shot with decent range and accuracy to take out the infected. All i hope is that I will survive to see day 2. I will be in contact with remaining humans such as Ben, Steve, dave, danielle and Chich. I hope that the 6 of us can come up with a plan of survival. If you read this post and are still alive please contact me so that we can all survive this together and make it out alive. Tomorrow will be my first real test because i will be traveling alone to class in the morning hours.
To all those still alive, I wish you luck
Robert

Witches teet!

3-3
Thats the best record the Gunx have had at a tournament. Due to a hurt thumb, I was stuck on the sideline both days. There was some problems that I noticed while watching and keeping stats.

Day 1:
Game 1: New Paltz vs. RPI "Z"
We started late due to some mix ups with the schedule but we started up after getting a very nice long warm up/self scrimage. We came out hard and scored first. The game was close all the way but we pulled ahead at hard cap to win 7-5. Ben Handbloacked Chetti!! TWICE!!! Alex Pinn had some beautiful cuts and catches and threw 2 goals to Brendan for a freshman connection. All in all we payed well but had some silly mistakes and bad drops. O BTW Doober loves "DA BLADE".

Game 2: New Paltz vs. Clarkson High Dive
After an hour and a half bye we got to play again and we came out fired up from our previous win against RPI. Im not sure about this game or the next but I do know that we lost.

Game 3: does not exist

Game 4: New Paltz vs. Purchase
Purchase got skullfucked and yet we had a bast. I realized that we play our best when we are having fun more then when we are trying to beat a team that angers us.

day 2:
Game 1: New Paltz vs. sienna
Great start to this game came out 3-0, going to half was a tad closer but we came out on top. I thought we played really well but could have been a tad better on the handle.

Game 2: New paltz vs union
god game couldnt get o working was a loss

Back in Action

Today is my first practice that i will be participating in and hopefully getting back to my goal of a fast speed, straight cuts, beautiful throws and amazing fakes.

Skullfucked

Just want to say that me and 2x4 skullfucked doober and e. herbst in the first crippleman game of the year. Just putting it out there that i got a Callahan, on a throw made by e. Herbst.

a slow start

We started this year nicely but we are moving slowly because of no shows at practice and sick/injured people. I am one of the sick/injured players that show up no mater what. I want to be able to do practice so that i can help the new players and old step up the games intensity. I know that i am one of those who should not speak about intensity because i do not bring it in the scrimmages but i try and bring it during the drills.

Drills:
The drills have become lack luster and slow moving because of dropped passes and not "going to". In the drills we should be running as fast as we possibly can so that we can become tired and keep going. The drills we have been doing so far are alright but we need to set aside and demonstrate how the drill should be done with ppl who want the team to go somewhere. After we are done with the drills then we should explain the offense and defense and what should happen.

Scrimmage:
So far the scrimmages have been going alright a few bumps but it doesn't look like a scrimmage it looks more like grab assing or pick up. There are fouls that go uncalled and a billion travels.(Nothing being called) Ok yes its the beginning of the year buit we have a tournament in two weeks time and we need to start teaching these things so that everyone is on the same page. If we dont call them out on it during practice the team we are versing sure as hell will. I know we dont want to put too much into the new kids right away but we need to put somnethng there. I definitly feel as though we need to teach them offenses more so that they can understand it. like take a whole week at teaching offense and making sure it runs smoothly. I dont care if it gets boring but we need to put it into their heads. I know im hypocritical about things but i feel as though an offense and a deffense should be the things to teach right now as we move into our next stage of ultimate.

Things i want to see in practice:
1) ten pole:
it works well for keeping the idea of possesion.
2) full field:
obvious reasons i want the new kids to understand the size of field we have to work with.
3) observing:
meaning having te captains sitting on the sidelines calling things out and talking to us and explainging things
4) intensity:
the full speed running abilities of all of our players, RUN, if your tired take a sub, then get back in and run some more.
5) attendance:
i would like to see the attendance to rise up so that there are more healthy players then sick players that show up

I dont know what to say but i want things to pick up better

havent done this in a while

forgot my password so i havent done this in a while, im sick so ill just do this when i feel better